After four months without a single post, some random impulse nags me to put up something new in this little droplet in the wide, bluish blogosphere. With but a few minutes to type and an unbelievable number of things to write, and an unbelievably chaotic flurry of emotions to match, it's more than appropriate to begin with the most recent events going on to the most distant.
Here begins my little recall of all that has happened to me in the past... and which may change me in the future...
[Tobacco User +4]
Yes, that header says it all. I have officially become a member of the International Cancer Stick Society. Armed with two boxes of Gudang Garam Signature and Menthol Mild, I know occasionally prowl the streets of Agno and Taft bearing in my mouth a lit stick of aromatic death. And the reason? More personal troubles which I am capable of dealing with, which however require me to maintain a cordial and calm attitude... something that can only be induced in my by alcohol, nicotine or THC. The first is a great way of getting kicked out of the University should one be caught under its influence while entering the campus, and the third is a one-way ticket to the rehabilitation center. I guess the second option simply leaves one with the classic scent of burnt leaves and a charred lung to boot, not to mention the other troubles associated with smoking. Oh well. If it means a calmer disposition and a lighter mood, I'll stick to it for the meantime just to cope.
[Raped by Politics]
I really hate to admit it, but there really is a lingering cancer in the Philippines' political system. And it really can be sucky to be a witness to such, especially when you've previously had high hopes for the state of the country. Becoming a LENTE paralegal volunteer as well as a PPCRV pollwatcher, not to mention actually being forced to vote for the lesser evil, has showed me that we still have a long road to travel as a nation and as a people. In a piece I never got to finish, I actually compared the development of the country in many of the key deveopmental sectors as a long walk down Malate... the same kind of walk I take whenever I feel that I've lost my reason for volunteering in La Salle for so long. There, I realize that there is more that we have to do and can do for the people that we cherish the most... the friends, the family, the strangers, the fiends... all of that. Oh well. Politics, they say, is only for the brave, the cunning, or the foolish.
A prerequisite to having a vice is to have a point of despair. Enter the Academic Workload. Yes, 17 undergraduate units inclusive of my first thesis subject, as well as a few grad school units, are killing me softly. With exams part and parcel of existence and papers a prerequisite to salvation, I feel that the eugenol in those kreteks are essential for controlling the random bouts of pain in my throat... after screaming out loud in agony and pain. At least Biochemistry is still brain-dead friendly, and Physical Chemistry is clear as crystal. Can't say the same for Philippine History though, as I have to enter a trance in order to understand the subject well.